The Little Things...

Yesterday I had the opportunity to attend a culminating event at Carter's school. It was a time where momma's and daddy's could come to school for about an hour and be "taught" by our kiddos. It was their chance to show us all the things that they had been learning in school so far, a chance to "show off their skills" as Carter put it. As soon as I walked into class Carter ran up to me and gave me a huge hug. The smile on his face said it all, he was SO happy to see me there.

To start, the teacher had all the kids line up and they started off by singing us a song. It's still stuck in my head...

"R-E-D red, R-E-D red, I can spell red, I can spell red..."

It was precious. Whoever thought that a song about the color red would actually make me tear up!  About a minute into the song, though, a little boy in the front row started to cry. I looked around to see why his mommy or daddy wasn't coming to his rescue only to realize that he was crying because his mommy and daddy were not there. The teacher scooped him up and did her best to comfort him. I felt so sad for the little guy.

Once the song was over we moved on to some activities. The kids were all so excited to "teach" us what they knew. As we walked to the table I noticed another sweet little girl with red eyes and a fist full of kleenex. Her mommy wasn't there either. My heart broke. It was all I could do to keep from crying myself. I asked if she wanted to come play with Carter and I and she reluctantly agreed. When I told Carter that his friend would be playing with us I could tell he was a little jealous. He wanted me all for himself that day and of course, I wanted to be all his. I took him aside and explained to him why his friend was so sad and how part of being a good friend to someone means that we try to cheer them up when they are sad, and he agreed to share me. I was so proud of him. Finally after a few games, the little girl's smile returned. We bonded over her awesome pink fuzzy boots.

There was a total of 4 kids in class whose mommy or daddy did not make it that day and my heart literally broke for each of them as I watched the tears stream down their little disappointed faces. Amidst all this I learned a lesson that will stick with me forever...

It's the little things that matter most to our children. It's coming to school to hear them sing about the color red. It's listening to them count to 100. It's playing blocks with them and showing them how proud we are of even their smallest accomplishments. It's being there for them.

Being present.

Being proud.

Being involved in what is important to them.

That day will stay with me for a very long time. I will never forget the smile on Carter's face when I walked into class and I will never forget the crying faces of those kids who had no one there for them. I realize that maybe those parents had to work. Maybe they wanted to be there so badly but couldn't. Maybe they felt extremely guilty. I realize that at some point we are all going to let our kids down and disappoint them, after all we are all imperfect. But it really impressed upon me the fact that our kids really ask so little of us. All they really want is our time, our attention...us. 

I hope that I will never be the momma who lets her son down or makes him feel unimportant.
I hope that by always being there for him he will know how proud I am of every single one of his accomplishments no matter how big or small they may be.
I hope that he will always feel like he can count on me to be there to support him and cheer him on.
I hope he'll know that every sacrifice I make for him is worth it to me.
I hope that in my presence he will always feel the unfailing love that I have for him.

xoxo,

Lacee

The BIG Day

I wonder what you're doing right now,

And if everyone is treating you kind.

I hope there is a special person,

A nice friend that you can find.

I wonder if the teacher knows

Just how special you are to me.

And if the brightness of your heart

is something she can see.

I wonder if you are thinking about me,

And if you need a hug.

I already miss the sound of your voice

And how you give my leg a tug.

I wonder if you could possibly understand

How hard it is for me to let you grow.

On this day know that my heart breaks,

For this is the first step in letting my baby go.
{poem via Pinterest}

xoxo,

Lacee

Linking up here

The Night Before Kindergarten

'Twas the night before kindergarten,
and as we prepared,
Carter was excited 
and a little bit scared.

He tossed and he turned
about in his bed,
while visions of school supplies 
danced in his head.

Erasers and crayons
and pencils galore
were stuffed in his backpack
and set by the door.

His uniform was hung
in the closet with care,
knowing that kindergarten
soon would be there.

Mom packed his snack
and then with a sigh,
topped it with an I love you note 
that made her start to cry.

Everything was packed
and ready you see,
everything that is except
for me.


Kindergarten Meet & Greet

{poem adapted from the book The Night Before Kindergarten}

xoxo,

Lacee

A New Chapter: Kindergarten and The WINNER of the Little Bow Necklace!!

Dear Carter,

Can you please tell me where the past five years have gone???

It seems like just yesterday I was anticipating your arrival. I had held you in my belly for 9 months and I was so ready to finally have you in my arms.

When I close my eyes and think back I can remember holding your tiny little body in my arms for the first time.

I can hear your little whimpers and new baby cries.

I can see your smushy little "fresh outta the oven" face peeking out from under the funny looking beanie the nurses put on your head.

I can feel your soft baby skin and your every breath on my chest.

I wish I could go back in time, for just a little while, and have those first precious moments back.

Everyone told me that it would all go by so fast, but I could have never imagined it would go by in the blink of an eye.

I remember thinking when you were born that your first day of school was so far off. Now all of a sudden it's just a week away. ONE WEEK! I've been emotional about this day for the past 5 years...seriously! I think I'm more nervous about your first day of school than you are! I mean I know you are ready and will love school and do just fine, but it's so hard letting go. It's hard realizing that at just 5 you are old enough to start exploring the world on your own...without me being there every step of the way.

I know it's silly, but I worry...a lot. I'm sure if there was a "first time mom handbook," chapter one would be all about how you are bound to become a worry wart.

I worry about not being there to make sure nobody bullies you on the playground.

I worry about the school having to be put on lock down beacause of some crazy gun wielding psycho and me not being there to protect you.

I worry about wether or not you'll remember to wash your hands after using the potty or not to put your mouth on the germ encrusted water fountain.

I worry about other kids calling you names and making you feel insecure.

I worry that you'll only eat the treat I pack you in your lunch box and throw the good stuff away.

I worry that maybe I haven't done enough over the past 5 years to prepare you for your big day.
I worry about serious things, I worry about stupid things...

worry, worry, worry.

Guess it's just part of my job description. As long as I'm alive, I'm always going to worry about you and want the absolute best for you.

You are such an amazing little man, my love. You are already so kind, caring and thoughtful. Wonderful qualities that I hope you carry with you forever. Today you wanted to make sure to say goodbye to a friend of ours who is blind and in a wheelchair. Thank you for reminding me to slow down and think about others. Even at only 5 I can tell that you have such a loving heart and I am so proud of you for that. 

You are so very smart Carter. You amaze me at how much you already know and can do and I'm sure that you are going to be a fantastic little student.

Everyday you make me laugh and bring so much joy and happiness to my day. Even on my darkest days, you are the sunshine that lights up my world. I can't imagine what life would be like without you here making me smile.

You make me so very proud to be a momma, your momma, and I feel so incredibly blessed and thankful to have you as my son.

This weekend we went shopping for all your school supplies and it was so much fun. Dad and I let you pick out whatever you wanted and you loved every minute of being a "big" boy. I know you don't realize it, but it's little moments like these that mean the world to me.

Choosing a lunch box. Star Wars or Green Lantern...hmmmm

Decisions, decisions

LOVE this face!

Got everything we need!

Booger Bear, even though it sometimes makes me sad that you are growing up so fast, I want you to know that I am enjoying every minute of it. I love watching you learn new things and I love seeing your little personality blossom. So, here's to a new chapter in our lives. A chapter that is sure to be full of lots of good times, memories and adventures.

Here's to starting Kindergarten!

I love you to infinity and beyond.

Love,

Momma

*************************************************************************

AND THE WINNER OF THE LITTLE BOW NECKLACE IS...

Comment #17 as chosen by Random.org

Lisa @ Organized Chaos!!!

Congrats Lisa!!!

Please email me before Thursday August 11th, 2011

with your address and color choice for the necklace 

so I can have it mailed to you ASAP :)

xoxo,

Lacee