Before becoming a momma, I had this whole preconceived idea of what motherhood would be like and what I would be like as a momma. I had this crazy idea that things would always go smoothly because I was going to be the "perfect" mom and because a "perfect" little angel was going to fly straight out of my birth canal. Boy was I...
WRONG.
You see, before Carter came along I had this whole set of rules that baby and I were going to follow. I based these rules on what I saw other moms do. Yes, as much as I hate to admit it, I used to be the annoying lady in the store who would give other moms "the look" when ignorant, childless me didn't think they were doing a good job. The look that said, "When I have kids they will NEVER do that." I'd stare them down in disgust if I saw their child licking the handle of the grocery cart {actually, that still really grosses me out}. I'd wonder why the heck they would let their child leave the house, let alone come to the store, dressed in a mismatched outfit. Or, if their child said inappropriate things, I'd hang my jaw in disbelief that they weren't able to control the things that came out of their kids mouth. I was pretty much determined to never, ever become "THAT" mom.
Little did I know that no matter how hard I tried I was never going to be "perfect" {far from it actually} and that no matter how good of a momma you are, ALL children are monsters from time to time and sometimes there is nothing you can do but sit back and watch the fury unfold. In all honesty, pretty much every one of my unrealistic rules have been broken. Here is the proof...
Crazy pre-mommy thought #1
My child will only leave the house in a perfectly color coordinated outfit from Gap Kids.
The reality...
My son leaves the house dressed as Indian Jones
and Obi Wan Kenobi from Star Wars
Crazy pre-mommy thought #2
My child will be clean and organized just like me.
The reality...
My child is a human tornado
Crazy pre-mommy thought #3
My child will not throw a tantrum in public.
The reality...
Been there done that.
Crazy pre-mommy thought #4
I will NEVER allow my child to eat sweets for dinner.
The reality...
Ice cream for dinner. Because sometimes its just too hot to cook
Crazy pre-mommy thought #5
My child will not watch TV.
The reality...
My child watches TOO much TV and sits too close to it
Crazy pre-mommy thought #6
My son won't talk about gross things.
The reality...
Every other word out of his mouth is about pee, poop, farts, or his wiener/"tenders"
Crazy pre-mommy thought #7
My child will always eat 3 balanced and healthy meals everyday.
The reality...
Because of lack of communication between mom and dad, child has had Mc Donalds twice in one day *hangs head in shame*
Crazy pre-mommy thought #8
My child will not be allowed to ride on or even touch those nasty germ covered rides outside of stores.
The reality...
They make for a good bribe so child will be good in said store
Crazy pre-mommy thought #9
I will not spoil or give in to my child.
The reality...
Could you say NO to this face?
Crazy pre-mommy thought #10
My kid will always be polite and say nice things.
The reality...
He once told a man wearing a tuban that he looked like Aladdin...true story.
So as you can see, I am "THAT" mom.
But what I've come to realize is that this does not make me a bad mom or mean that I'm failing at motherhood. It means that
I'm human.
I'm not perfect and I shouldn't expect perfection from my son either. It means that since parenting does not come with a manual, it's ok to break the rules sometimes as long as its safe and no one is getting hurt. And I'm sure that someday when Carter looks back on his childhood {as crazy as it might have been}, he will not remember all the things that I did wrong, but he will remember and know just how much he was loved.
xoxo,
Lacee
What were YOUR crazy pre-mommy thoughts?
